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December 5th, 2010 at 04:18 pm

My brother's memorial service was yesterday. My parents were pleasantly surprised by how many people showed up - 106. Mostly people who knew my parents and not my brother, or only knew him thru them. Some of my brother's high school friends showed. I find most of the things about funerals to be extremely strange, but having so called friends come to your memorial service when you haven't talked to them in over 10 years is one of the strangest to me. If you were such good friends, why not do things with someone while they are still alive? He really needed to be doing stuff with friends in the last few years, it was part of his problem, not having friends. He would get depressed and then drink.

Anyways, they said it went really well. My oldest neice went to their house afterwards and mom invited me over. We spent several hours just talking about everything under the sun. I enjoyed it alot.

My best friend came over today and we talked for several hours also. I got a pizza from Papa Murpheys and we started to watch Casino Royale, which she brought with her. She's getting over a bad cold and after awhile she felt ill and decided to go home. She left the movie with me to finish watching.

I finished reading the library book Infamous by Suzanne Brockmann. Romance - ok

4 Responses to “weekend”

  1. ccrawford Says:

    If I knew someone or worked with someone or even know their families I attend the persons funeral when they pass. I have memories of the past, which I will always carry with me, but I feel as though I want to pay my final respect to the person and also to give my support to the family and other friends in which the person leaves behind. The family seems to enjoy the fond memories you and others have of their loved ones, I believe they really do appreciate that.
    In these days and times we don't always see our friends and the people we love everyone seems so involved with their own life, even families don't get together and spend time together like they did when I was growing up. Just my perspective.

  2. Petunia 100 Says:

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

  3. Joan.of.the.Arch Says:

    Not sure this has anything to do with the things on your mind, but when my alcoholic older brother died he had zero friends, former friends, or acquaintances come to the memorial service. It was only family, plus a co-worker of my sister who I'm sure never met him. My brother had long since lost the ability to make or keep real friends. In my mind, he was only probationarily in my life, as I had to protect my new nuclear family. Thank goodness we got to have some pleasant, sober conversations and even do some projects together as "normal" people before he died.

    My DH, my son, and I once went to a church funeral for the mother of an acquaintance who herself has few friends in this world.. The mother apparently had none. The total attendees at the funeral were 8: the priest, the daughter, the granddaughter & her boyfriend, me & mine, and a social worker. The only flowers were the mix I carried in a basket, half of them wild grasses gathered from along the railroad, half of them artificial sprigs from the florist.

    So, I'm thinking that somehow, if former friends of your brother came to his funeral, they at least felt some connection to him or your family. Something motivated them to come.

  4. M E 2 Says:

    My father requested no funeral/memorial service when he died. His feelings were if you can't bother to come and see me while I'm alive (this applies ONLY to those who live in the area, btw) you sure as heck don't need to come and "see" me when I am dead.

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